Crabby Mama

This video shows Disney’s plans to expand Fantasyland to include more princess lands. Never mind Leah, I can’t wait for 2012!

So you know how I talked about being done having kids when Adam was born? At the end of pregnancy I was pretty done, and once he was born I was REALLY done. The first few months are so hard. But now? Now I am not so sure…

Adam has gotten into a good rhythm lately and it becomes easier to tell myself that this doesn’t have to be the end. Mike looked at me like I was crazy when I said it the other day. But I have a feeling that eventually, if I really wanted another, I could convince him.

Ok, so last week I asked you to start thinking about some goals you could set on the road to making your relationship better (happier). Here is what I came up with for me:

1. Take more of the little things off his mind. I tend to avoid making phone calls to straighten things out (cable, insurance, etc.) and that means Mike has to do it which stresses him out. If I could take it upon myself to take care of these things, Mike could relax more.
2. Take more time for intimacy. Should be self-explanatory. I have been avoiding this more since Adam was born and Mike seems to be the opposite. So this is something I can do to create more of a closeness between us.
3. Be supportive about things he is excited about (his ski trip, happy hours with co-workers) even when they inconvenience me. I was dreading his ski trip because he will be gone for 5 days. But he will appreciate it if I am excited with him, so I have to look at it as a chance for him to recharge his batteries and he will come back to us happier, which in turn makes me happier.
4. Be more money-conscious. Mike is a saver and I am a spender. If I just acted more conscious of my spending, I think that wouold alleviate a LOT of the stress between us.

I hope that by supporting him, taking his mind off little things, being closer, and being careful of my spending we can see more happy moments between us (and we have plenty already).

If you are ever interested in reading a blog with REALLY clever writing, try this one: Here be Hippogriffs by Julia. No, I don’t know her. But I blog-stalk her. Don’t even remember how I found her blog, but she has a 7 yr old boy who is a genius and 2 1/2 yr old twins (boy-girl) and her writing style hits me just the right way. If you do check it out, let me know what you think.

Adam had a GREAT morning at the portrait studio.

Ladies, ladies, ladies, there is more than enough of me to go around.

See, this here is my heart.

I think Adam has turned the corner in the sleep department. My old stand-by, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, has this to say about sleep maturation:

* 6 Weeks Old: Night sleep lengthens. This is in close range of the expected sleeping 7-8 hours by 7-8 weeks old for BW babies. For Baby Whisperer babies, Hogg says babies are sleeping about 6 hours around this age. So Adam did not do this. But has started sleeping close to 6 hours at a time this past weekend!!!
* 12-16 Weeks Old: Daytime sleep regularizes. This is around 3-4 months old. Adam is finally “getting” naps. He naps 4 times a day for between 1-2 hours each time. When he has too long of waketime he still naps and still falls asleep well with minimal crying.
* 9 Months Old: Disappearance of night wakings for feedings and baby drops third nap. I am happy to say my kids all slept through without eating long before 9 months old.
* 12-21 Months Old: Drops morning nap. Babywise says this happens between 14-22 months, so it is a pretty similar time range.
* 3-4 Years Old: Afternoon nap less common. (Non-existent in my case)

So we are just now seeing a night schedule of:
Bedtime between 7-8pm
Wake-up between 12-2 for feed
Wake-up between 6-7:30 for first morning feeding

Then I put him down no more than one hour after waking up for his first nap. The day goes from there. There is no set schedule for naps as far as times on the clock, but I just make sure that I try to put him down one hour after he wakes up and it takes about 2-3 minutes of crying lightly (usually) for him to fall asleep for an hour or two. All I wanted was for things to be a bit more predictable AND to get more sleep at night. Both things happened at the same time. This is one happy mommy over here!

February’s theme is love and marriage. Rubin notes that, “working on my marriage was an obvious goal for my happiness project, because a good marriage is one of the factors most strongly associated with happiness…the atmosphere of my marriage set the weather for my whole life” (39). Scientific study, anecdotal evidence and my own personal observation certainly confirm that, arguably the most primary relationship in an adult’s life, the marital relationship has a strong impact on happiness.

Today, I’m not setting any goals (or asking you to). Today is about reflecting on where you are, and brainstorming where you want to be.

I was talking to some friends the other day about marriage. We mentioned how not everyone is lucky enough to KNOW deep down that they are with the right person. That is not to say that we have not been through any rough patches. But ultimately because of those times, I feel like we have consciously, over and over, made the decision to be together. EVERYTHING is better with Mike here with me. Sharing the laughter and the difficulties of daily life with him is all that I ever hoped it would be. It becomes more and more insane to think that I almost settled for less. I did not think that there was someone out there just right for me. But that is how I feel.

Now we have our differences. But in all the ways that matter, the ones that make lifetime partners, we fit together exactly right. I am proud of our (almost) 7 years together with no sign of the “itch” in sight. I eagerly anticipate the next 70 years with him by my side every day.

To make it the next 70 years, I am sure there are things I can do to better our relationship. And obviously a better relationship leads to a happier life.

And that will be the Happiness Project for February – what steps can you take to be more positive in your relationship? Rubin has hers, and they’re great…for her. But this is one month where her roadmap is not so helpful. Only you know what you can do to improve your relationship. So start thinking of a couple goals!

There was a time when I thought potty training Erin would be a breeze. And I guess it might have been if I had taken the time to devote to it. I just could NOT remember to take her to the potty every hour and she was soaking her pull-ups. They are more expensive, so I didn’t want to waste them. I started putting her back in regular diapers. And they are a pain to take on and off to sit on the potty. So I would get all annoyed when she would say, “I have to go pee pee!” instead of encouraging her. She seems to want to go potty at the most inopportune times (like when I am breastfeeding), not when I actually ask her if she has to go. She still mostly goes poop on the potty, but sometimes not. We are nowhere near being successfully potty trained.

Adam’s sleeping is getting SOOOO much better. Over the weekend he took at least one 2 hour nap a day and the other naps were averaging an hour apiece. Yesterday he took TWO 2 hour naps. Today so far, his first nap was 2 hours. I might have screwed things up though because I kept him up almost 2 hours so we could have our first outing to the gym (more on that in a minute). Hopefully that is not the case.

Also, yesterday I started feeding him from both sides at each feeding. The theory is that the reason he is waking up so often at night is because he is not getting enough calories during the day. So I am trying to up his calorie intake during the day in HOPES he will sleep longer stretches at night. Last night he ate at 7:45p, 11p, 2:30a, and then got up for the day at 6:30a. Still no longer than 4 hours at a time. I will continue to do both sides, since he seems to want to, and see where that gets us.

Adam went to the gym daycare today! I know he is supposed to be three months, but SHHHH don’t tell anyone. I think he is close enough to count. He woke up from his first nap at 10a, so I fed him and got us ready. We got there at 10:40 and I did about 50 minutes (4 mi on the bike and 1.35 mi on the treadmill). Then I got a protein shake for lunch (nutter butter=YUM!) and we were home by 11:55. He pretty much went straight to sleep. The daycare workers said he did GREAT and was adorable and talkative. At the end he started rooting, which is what he does when he is tired. I know I overextended his waketime, but how else will I ever get to the gym? Once or twice a week hopefully won’t make a difference.